Some days I feel like being a total mean girl. I know it's rude to say, but I get tired of being the nice one, the responsible one, the kindhearted one, or the one folks can always depend on. Lately I've been feeling really unappreciated and I'm fed up!
My phone rings so much with people asking for advice or asking for favors. I never turn anyone away because I try to make the lives of those closest to me a little easier. If all I have to do is talk someone through a tough situation or commit to doing a few hours of service for someone I'm all in. I do this for people I LOVE because isn't that what you're supposed to do for those you care for?
Yeah right, I say. It's all well and nice to have someone you can always depend on, but today I'm wondering who do I have to depend on? Who can I call when I am frustrated and need a reality check or moment of clarity from someone I feel knows me well? No one. Everyone else is too busy with life to return my phone calls and text messages. Ain't that a trip?
So I've declared today Mean Girl Day. I'm not listening to anyone's problems, I'm not helping anyone do shit, and I am not gonna be bothered! That means no more going out of my way to check on my so-called friends who never call to check on me or my family or doing nice things to show them all how much I care. While some people think it's ok to occasionally say "thanks for always being there" or "I'm glad to you're a part of my life" I'd like to convey those thoughts with actions. You can tell verbally share a sentiment with someone all the time but until you begin to prove it with actions, it doesn't mean anything! Starting today, I'm putting all of my energy into myself and my children because if anyone needs it, we do. I just can't deal. You would think that I would learn how to say no every now and again so I wouldn't get burned out so fast, but I still haven't learned!
Wow I'm feeling mean already! Sorry for the rant, but every now and again I believe it's necessary. It just wouldn't be real if we didn't share the good, the bad, and the ugly things about ourselves.
Does anyone feel where I'm coming from? Someone out there please tell me I'm not going crazy.